that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize