I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
