so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Randomize