What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
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