I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize