Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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