Dual....:-)
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize
