Capitaan dildo arrescate!
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
