Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Randomize