You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
