i think i have two assholes
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
It's rum buckets o'clock
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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