me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
