oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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