wanna go halves on a baby?
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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