Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
