A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize