I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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