like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
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Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
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I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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