last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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