yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
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