Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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