You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
