Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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