we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
