Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
