Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
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