We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
organizing the empties. That sober.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Randomize
