her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Randomize
