Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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