just survived the first fart of the relationship.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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