Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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