I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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