you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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