Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I lost the right to judge tonight
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
