This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
