Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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