I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize
