I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
