I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
