idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
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He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
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"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
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