I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
