i permit you to call me
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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