no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
