come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I wish they made helmets for livers.
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When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
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He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo