I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
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