Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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