And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
How naked do you want me to be?
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