First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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