How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
