I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
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