My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
